Light

Arms raised before her, palms turned
Up-towards the sky.
She smiles and closes her eyes.
The sun caresses her face.

She’s not sure what she is waiting for
But it’s something wonderful-
More powerful than she could ever imagine.
She couldn’t say how she knew.

Flower petals drift down from some unknown source
and land softly in her hands.
Bringing the petals closer to her face,
She can smell their sweet fragrance.

Delicate promises from the heavens.
The sun warms her fingers, and
It flows through her,
Filling her completely.

Her heart feels peaceful and secure.
She opens her eyes and feels so free.
Smiling-and with happy tears,
She runs toward the light.

The Widow

She stares down at the cool clear
Water filling the gleaming white porcelain tub.
It almost glimmers as it reflects the lights.
Months have passed since he’s been gone
Lost at sea one foggy night.

“Fell overboard, legs got caught in the seaweed.
His boat went on without him.”
The fisherman said.

The water spilled over the lip of the tub
overflowing onto the black and white tiles-
Pooling around her feet.
She steps in and lays back sending streams rushing out around her.
That tap still running-
In her mind mimicking the “roaring” of the ocean.

“Yes ma’am, his body washed up on the rocks not far from the docks.
Poor soul-
Didn’t stand a chance when that storm blew in.”

She doesn’t know how much more of this she can take.
How she will go through life without him.
The water is under her chin-
taking a deep breath she submerges herself.
Letting out a breath-
A bubble floats up to the surface…
She wonders at how easy it would be to let it all out.
She empty’s her lungs and waits for the courage to….

A pounding interrupts her thoughts-
She quickly sits up in the tub and
Gasps for air!
“Mommy! The waters coming out from under the door!
Mommy!”

Stars are Falling From The Sky

Stars are falling from the sky
Its not so strange to see.
But what happens if a star
Would fall and land on me?

Would I burn up into tiny embers
To be blown away with the winds?
Will I soak up its rays
and shoot starlight from my hands?

I imagine I could catch one
and break it into parts.
Pierce it deeply within my chest to
replace the hole that’s in my heart.

Randomness...

I have no idea where any of this came from..lol, just thought I'd put it up. It is three separate things......

*I can’t believe this day. Its like no other. Its colors paint a picture that I would never have believed. Tears fell that day and my screams were louder than anything I had ever imagined could come out of me, out of my soul. Blues splash across my eyes and I can’t see anymore. I am running blindly and I can feel it creeping up on me. The blackness of his soul. His breath hot on my neck. I could feel it deep in my body, making everything inside of me crunch up into a ball. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I ran. I ran faster than ever before in my life. I had to escape this day. The dark gray day.


*What if he held on too tight. What if I could never ever again see the sunshine dancing off his face? Can he hear me? Can he sense what I’m feeling? How can I let this go when it feels so right in my heart? Will this ever come to be? Him and me?

*Emotions run deep this time of day. The days work is almost over and it seems like one can’t take even one more thing. Drained. We yell, we scream, and we fight for this day. Its not over. So much left yet to do.

Looking

I look
Everywhere.
Under rocks
Up in trees.
Its nowhere to be found.
I sigh.
I scream.
Desperation.
I shake my head.
Side to side.
Side to side.

untitled 1

It used to be mine.
It was given to me…
I didn’t understand how I was to care for it.
Nobody taught me.
It just never really seemed to be a part of me.
Time went by and at some point…
It was nobodies responsibility but mine.
Somehow, I had learned to separate myself from it.
In my mind it was not mine…
It has to be someone else’s.
I can’t understand it.
It doesn’t have anything to do with me.
Not the real me.
Moments of clarity
When the awesomeness of the responsibility
Sets in.
The time that was wasted looking the other way.
The time that was wasted not living up to dreams.
Time that was wasted…..
Knowing,
That now I have the opportunity
To take this thing,
And make it better…
Is awesome.
But bittersweet.
Somehow the knowing,
That it will never be as wonderful
As it could have been.
Better, but not the same.
Never the same
As it could have been…